Homeopathic Medicine is not medicine but it works

Homeopathic does not claim to solve or medicate problems.  To my understanding, it’s a support that aids the body and mind to get to the cause or root of the a said problem, disease, illness, ailment.

The problem usually lies with the sale of homeopathic medicine for the self-mediator, who’s looking to alleviate symptoms.  If one has the guidance of a good practitioner along with the medication it can be very beneficial for getting to the cause.  I’ve tried homeopathic both ways, and find it far more beneficial with a practitioner who would literally spend two hours of weekly talk sessions while only prescribing a few “globules” of medicine. 

I’d always experienced deep profound transformation at a psychological level, where it became clear that most “illnesses or disruptions of health” are somatic (psychological physical manifestations). 

In short, Homeopathic is experiential where hidden emotions, blocks and desires  surface and must be dealt with.  It is an energy medicine as opposed to “western medicine” that does indeed only work on “symptoms” through harsh drugs whose side effects usually warrant the need for more “drugs” for the resulting new symptoms.  I’ve made huge career and relationship changes that were more in tune with my true nature under Homeopathy.

 I’ve recently begun Vipassana meditation and understand that the only way to healing is to “know oneself”.  Meditation seems to be the only safe and sure way to reach that goal.  In my case, for the first time, with the aid of a monk I feel safer than when on my own, for the very reason I was getting trapped, or taken off my path by sensations or paranormal phenomena.  

I’ve meditated before, using various techniques, as part of a psychic training program and on my own and find it safer under the guidance of a teacher I trust. A simple teacher that wants nothing in return whose devotion to a simple and pure life is an inspiration.  One that helps discern all the negatives and tangents along the way and recognizes the benefits of acupuncture.

As an extremely sensitive person, I’ve found that Traditional Chinese Medicine & Acupuncture, Homeopathy and Bach flowers are the most beneficial for my person. It takes the “whole” person into account and doesn’t disrupt my already sensitive nature allowing me to “feel” resulting changes at a core level.

Until I progress in my meditation practice these energetic medicines serve as “holistic” aids in my journey to healing and possible enlightenment.

 

Is the Sun Absolute?

 

 

This may be obvious….

But, isn’t the sun, at least for the inhabitants of earth a symbol, metaphor, an example or proof of an absolute truth or objective reality?

It shows up and leaves at different times of the day.

BUT, it’s always there. 

People experience this truth differently in different parts of the world

BUT, it’s always there you can count on it. 

Saying that reality is what you make of it or that you choose your reality is true to an extent…Just as I can choose to travel to different parts of the world to experience the Sun in different ways. 

BUT it’s always there regardless of my choices

No matter what my personal perspective, experience or conscious choice of or about the Sun, it is a constant.  I cannot change the existence of the Sun, with my beliefs.  That is an absolute.

The subjective reality perspective seems to take the issue of  “responsibility” and “choice” to an extreme.  I’m in agreement with personal responsibility, freedom to choose and varying relative truths but…

If everything is just a projection of my thoughts and beliefs than nothing really exists, only the projector, which seems extremely self-ish and lonely. 

If I only exist, then how does that explain all the blogs on wordpress for example. I’m not the center of the universe, the sun doesn’t revolve around me exclusively.

I know that not only “I” exist because I can “feel” strong connections, which are usually reciprocal.  When two people connect at a soul level consciousness, the subjective reality view is that I created this.  This is way bigger than myself, I don’t have the skills for that.

If I don’t have the skills for that, there must be a creator.  If there is a creator, there must be an absolute truth as is symbolized by the sun, a creation of the creator.

My power to choose, create, see, feel, think, experience or project is part of many truths while part of the whole, not the whole itself.

As for creating “my own reality”, the Law of Attraction works, even before I learned it had a “name”. 

I used to call it “praying.  I don’t ask for proof and believe in manifestation only if it’s for my highest good and or the timing is right.

I guess though, I’m looking for a fundamental truth to agree on with others that recognizes or brings connection not separation.  If there were one truth to agree on what would it be?

301:302 Again!

This past October a friend came to visit from Germany.  We went to Busan for a few days and checked into a hotel.  Well, wouldn’t you know that my room number was 302 and my friend’s was 301!  

If you read my previous post on repeating numbers you’ll find that this incident has in total appeared four times since 2007 as the number of my apartment and most recently as a hotel room number. It cannot be discounted and anyone who refutes a meaning attributed to 301:302 appearing in my life consistently doesn’t have a chance.  There are no coincidences.  

301:302 has led me to some conclusions after much thought and research.  I’ll post later.

Seon-won-sa Temple in Seoul: Progressive Buddhism?

 

Lee won-il, Sunmudo Zen Master was a big inspiration for my move to Gyeongju.

When we’d first met at Golgusa Temple in Gyeongju in December 2007, I was surprised to learn he wasn’t a monk.  After my initial Sunmudo experience, a Korean Zen Buddhist Martial Art and path to enlightenment taught at Golgusa Temple, I was intent on returning for serious study.  As impossible as it seemed, after only a month my wishes came true.  A job teaching at Gyeongju University offer meant I’d be able to move to Gyeongju and study Sunmudo.

 After three weeks upon my arrival, the sad news that Master Lee would be leaving for Seoul was indeed surprising if not somewhat disappointing.  Thus my first lesson of attachment was about to begin.  Miraculously, I realized my move to Gyeongju was not contingent on his being there; nor was my happiness.  So I studied and survived the loss of my inspiration and teacher.  However, the absence of his presence could be felt by all nonetheless.  He came to a point in his life to further his Buddhist studies in an effort to still plaguing life questions in search of happiness.

Six months later in August 2008, I was on my way to visit Master Lee in Seoul, fill my soul with performance and art at The Fringe Festival and buy a digital camera with tentative plans to sleep at a hostel. What I got in lieu of my plans was completely unexpected.

We sat in the Taiwanese Temple café where Master Lee teaches Sunmudo catching up. “How are you”, I asked, “I’m haaappppy”, he replied.  “Three months ago I became a monk and I’ve never been happier”.  “Wow”, was all that escaped from my lips, but I wasn’t in the least surprised, he was always a monk to me.

The head monk of Seon-won-sa thought the same and accepted him to train to full monk hood under his tutelage.  Master Lee ordained as a monk goes by his spiritual name, Kak-Be.

I asked if I could possibly stay the night at his Temple.  He quickly phoned the head monk with the reply that I was welcome. Kak-Be was excited about introducing me to his teacher and head monk.  He felt all foreigners should have the experience of meeting him for the simple reason his teaching was clear and simple.

Seon-won-sa is a small temple at Kang buk gu Su yoo-dong in Seoul, from the outside it’s not a typical Korean Temple.  We walked in and were greeted by a monk, then taken to the kitchen where I was introduced to Seo-jin, the head monk and offered something to drink, a beer perhaps?  Did I hear right? 

I don’t like beer all that much and declined the offer.  I preferred red wine.  Master Lee’s wife quickly left the room and came back with a bottle of good quality French red wine she’d been saving for an occasion.  She opened it and poured some for all in small glasses. I’d already known that Master Lee had a wife and two children and was about to find that most if not all the monks living at Seon-won-sa were married with children. This temple was a special place, a progressive place, a place where monk-hood could be gotten without extreme sacrifice; my interest was piqued. 

They explained that Buddha’s original teaching said nothing of celibacy and that happiness is important.  So if a little red wine or a beer makes you happy, isn’t that what counts?  I’d always felt between “a rock and a hard place” myself.  While I wanted to commit to a spiritual and holy practice I didn’t want to sacrifice aspects of life I found enjoyable and thought, “I may have found a jewel here in the back streets of Seoul”.

We sat around a table with three monks dressed in simple grey tee shirts and sweat pants, not robes.  Along with their wives, we all sipped red wine while becoming acquainted before getting to the “Questions of life”.  As I wasn’t prepared for my “one question”, I improvised and allowed the conversation to flow, go where it wanted to. 

It was surprisingly relaxed despite the fact the head monk didn’t speak English save a word or two to make clearer his meaning.  Master Lee did the translating and invited me to have a translated conversation with Seo-jin the next day when a fluent English speaker would be present.

Seo-jin is a likable, approachable man, a monk without airs, kind of like a true friend. There was no struggle due to language. We communicated.  Seo-jin spoke, I listened to his gist.  I spoke, he listened and got me, finally stating he believed I’d be a good Buddhist student should I want to study Buddhism.

“My ability for happiness can reach the highest highs while my potential for sadness can reach the lowest lows”, I told him, thinking he’d dub me as manic with a need for balance.  To my surprise, he responded, “The height of happiness is as high as the highest mountains and the lows of sadness are as deep as the deepest valleys, one must experience them to know life.  So, I’m not crazy, I thought, now this is interesting.

Seo-jin took a deep interest in my overall heath with concern and compassion. I found his own wife recently passed due to exhaustion, something I’m currently experiencing myself.  I bid everyone goodnight and went to sleep awaking at 4:00 for chanting and meditation in the temple, then had breakfast with everyone. Seo-jin looked into my eyes and hands that morning, “There’s nothing wrong with you, you’re just tired.  You need to sleep”.

I wandered around Seoul that entire day intent on filling my soul with art and performance, which never came about.  I returned to the temple that night catching the end of Seo-jin’s Buddhist class held in the kitchen where a room full of people were seated around a table asking questions, taking notes and listening to him speak.  It was focused yet casual.  At the close of class, Lee Go Eun, or Maya Lee, as she introduced herself to me was to translate an hour-long private session with the head monk for me.

Maya Lee majored in Buddhist Studies at a Seoul University, because as she put it, “I wanted to know the truth”.  After her studies she worked at Golgusa Temple in Gyeongju, where she met Master Lee and one of the other Seon-wan-sa resident monks who urged her to meet with the head monk at Seo-wan-sa. 

“What is Buddhism?”, Maya asked the head monk who replied,  “I am here now”. 

“It was truth simply put”, Maya explained when I asked what made her decide to study at Seo-wan-sa.

Master Lee, Seo-jin, Maya Lee and I sat around a table in a private room and began the session, an intensive one and a half hours.  The head monk looked straight into my eyes when he spoke Korean, his speech passionate and clear, and asked: 

What do you want?   He lead me to conclude absolute bottom line what I’d wanted out of life.  Of the multitude of options and choices that had been mulling around in my head, I was certainly surprised they no longer had any validity.  If I could choose only one, then it was simply “to be happy”, how that was to come about didn’t matter.

“I can help you find happiness, if that’s what you want”, he replied.  I was in awe at the depth Seo-jin was willing to go with me, fulfilling my need for intensive clarity.  After the session was over, we talked about the possibility to study at the Temple. 

Maya and I left the room, Kak-Be returned excited with the news that Seo-jin would accept me as a student.  The factors blocking the possibility of studying with Seo-jin is hard to overcome as the limits of language is a disheartening reality. 

Kak-Be suggested Maya Lee translate the classes, a huge task and commitment.  “Perhaps in the future, as I’m quite busy”, she replied.  I suggested we just wait and see what solutions would come up, as it didn’t seem reality would budge at the moment unless I could speed learn Korean. 

The next morning I awoke and joined the Sunday temple service filled with members perched on simple brown cushions listening to the head monk dressed in a starched sheer billowy silver gray robe speaking expressively for an hour while using a whiteboard to diagram and drive his point. I understood nothing and sat in silence, half meditating trying to absorb his words using other faculties. As we all know, language is essentially limited and can never fully communicate one’s experience.

As to studying Buddhism at Seo-wan-sa, everything changes, it has to, so who knows, perhaps the future will afford me a way.  I have faith, that all will turn out, as it should.

I left Seo-wan-sa on day three inspired and infected by Kak-ba’s happiness and enthusiasm and the head monk’s compassion, knowledge, expression of beauty and clarity of thought.  Simply put, there was an energetic exchange not bound by words. 

That is communication.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Paralell Universe/Multiple Realities

It was 9:18, my time I’d just gotten up from bed after staring up at the ceiling pondering the concept of a parallel or multiple universes..
The ceiling, a patterned row of squares, row upon row, helped organize my thoughts about the possibilities.

Having come to some conclusion I jumped to my computer, got online and went straight to the personal development blog, clicked on Multiple Universes, a new thread that had started at 9:07.  I felt connected.

It had been my focus all week, reading various science sites, mixing it with my own ideas in an effort to make sense of uncanny experiences, where a multiple universe would be a satisfying discovery.

Reads by Dr. Michio Kaku, the originator of string theory, theories by Hugh Everett, Niels Bohr, Einstein and more.

A good site with information:

http://science.howstuffworks.com/parallel-universe2.htm

An interesting book on the subject:
“The Universe and multiple reality by Prof. M.R. Franks, and he quotes:

“There is no one reality. Each of us lives in a separate universe. That’s not speaking metaphorically. This is the hypothesis of the stark nature of reality suggested by recent developments in quantum physics. Reality in a dynamic universe is non-objective. Consciousness is the only reality.”

The following are blog entries that make damn sense, taken from the “Personal Development for Smart People” blog forum at www.stevepavlina.com
(click on Intention-Manisfestation, then Multiple Universes for the original posts)

I believe all possibilities already exist. It’s like a hypersphere of experience radiating outwards into infinity. It is composed of consciousness. Points of consciousness determine what experience they have based on what they tune their consciousness to. It is similar to an enormous ocean of frequency. What we think of as “wave collapse” is consciousness transversing along nodes of experience because its focus or frequency has changed.

So from that perspective all realities exist. An infinity of them. We get to sift through that infinity of parallel realities and pluck out conscious experiences to have.

Good. In my case right now it’s more like potentialities or possibilities…a possibility can be said to “exist”, no? Every time we make a decision, no matter how minor, we alter what is compared with what could have been. In that respect we aren’t plucking, we’re producing the reality, but the possibility of that reality existed before we caused it to manifest.

From my perspective (and that’s all it is, so your view is perfectly valid as well), I see the world in terms of experience. Experience exists within the field of consciousness.

On one level, we exist as points of consciousness experiencing various things or possible events, a small percentage of which, become actualized events for us.

On another level, which I would call the continuum of consciousness, all POSSIBLE experience is already enfolded and manifest.

The tangible realm is contained inside the intangible realm. If that makes any sense.

Your essence is far more vast than your human body can accommodate. However, there are countless parallel “you’s” with the same or similar overleaves and similar bodies. These parallel you’s are experiencing different aspects of your life task, giving your essence a more complete experience of the physical plane. Some may think of these parallel you’s as not being as valid as the you who is reading these words. They are, in fact, as real to themselves as you are to yourself. Sometimes there is bleedthrough between parallel selves, especially when you are asleep and dreaming.

A post that got my goat in response to a blogger asking for information about the existance of Multiple Universes…
(I’ll have to meditate on it to see why it did):

What kind of answer are you looking for? Like you want to know if it’s true or not? If that’s the question you have, I think it is something you will have to meditate on and think about, and just “feel” if it’s true for you or not.
I studied this theory in a class this semester, and basically we learned that some people believe it might exist, but there is no scientific way to ever confirm or deny its existence.

While I get that one needs to find out how they feel about something, that information doesn’t prove its existence or not. As if saying that if they exist for you than they do in fact exist. It’s not subjective. The oft loosely spoken “we create our own realities” comes to mind. The term should be “we create our own situations that can affect reality”.

Wikipedia Reality Definition: (many pages on reality)
Reality (disambiguation) refers to the state of things as they actually exist as opposed to how they could possibly exist.
Reality, in everyday usage, means “the state of things as they actually exist”. [1] [2] The term reality, in its widest sense, includes everything that is, whether or not it is observable or comprehensible. Reality in this sense may include both being and nothingness, whereas existence is often restricted to being (compare with nature). In other words, “reality”, as a philosophical category includes the formal concept of “nothingness” and articulations and combinations of it with other concepts (those possessing extension in physical objects or processes for example).
In the strict sense of western philosophy, there are levels or gradation to the nature and conception of reality. These levels include, from the most subjective to the most rigorous: phenomenological reality, truth, fact, and axiom.

When one lives by their own rules or standards in contrast to following the status quo, as if Society is a model of the norm, the collquial definition of reality gets put to use and one that gets me all tied up in a knot. Society is no example of what is real. It is merely a form among many that people follow or don’t. However, mass consciousness tends to follow society’s standard.

I don’t need to convince myself that multiple realties or universes exist. For me, they do. The point is, do they exist separate from my experience? Because if they don’t then….?

In the Theory of Positive Disintegration by Polish psychiatrist and psychologist, he writes that society is the lowest level of consciousness.

Below is a blogger after my own heart found at www.stevepavlina.com
click on Spirituality & Conciousness, then on
Subjective Reality-Life is Not My Dream

I know from personal experience my emotional resonance effects my reality BUT physical reality is not my individual dream or creation.
How do I know this? What’s the proof?
LANGUAGE
When I was in infant form and knew no words or language how did I dream
others who could talk and speak and teach me to talk if everything in my personal reality is a product of my individual consciousness?

If reality is subjective then it’s all about me…there is no ‘other’ to learn from.
So anything which is developed can only be developed by me…there is no one else.
So where did these ‘teachers’ come from and why did I forget how to walk and talk?

Unless reality is subjective and I’m just schizophrenic.

Is Your Environment Good for You: Geomancy?

While you can never escape yourself and always bring your emotion, experiences, inherited qualities, problems and “illusions” where ever you go there are more factors to consider than just your “state of mind” when questioning if an environment is good for you.

Everything has energy, why not a geographical place? How you feel about a geographical location is quite different from its existing inherent energy.

While living in Germany, long ago, a psychic told me that Germany’s earth energy was not good for me. I would definitely agree as it brought out a part of me I didn’t like which prompted serious study about my own energy in an effort to understand and heal my darker side.

A really good example I like to use is the Italian movie “Life is Beautiful” about a father and his child in concentration camp awaiting execution. The father refuses to mar his child with the “reality” of the Nazi’s intentions and tells him the camp is a big game where you can win a real army tank. He puts on funny skits in front of the officers to keep his son laughing and sane. The father is eventually executed, the child survives is reunited with his mother, unmarred by the experience.
**What the father did was triumph in a horrific situation but he couldn’t prevent the reality of other energetic forces no matter how strong or positive his state of mind was.

I went on a trip to Croatia, in Istria, in the guide books it talks about the positive energy of the area, where many alternative healing seminars were starting to take place as a result. The area has the greatest concentration of “conscientious objectors” in the warring history of former Yugoslavia.

Presently in Korea, where I make frequent overnight visits at a Buddhist temple and am in agreement with others the energy there is distinctly powerful and positive. I recently took a job offer to be close to this energy and study at the temple.

I read that Hitler was quite interested in Geomancy. Here’s an excerpt from Mary Sutherland’s Upcoming Book, ‘In Search of the Mound Builders’

“The forces of nature do not discriminate. He who has the knowledge, hold the power, whether it be of the dark side or light. On its darker side we have Adolph Hitler. For his Aryan Race Master Plan, Hitler researched folk customs and geomancy; first to learn more about their Aryan forefathers and later to control Europe geomantically.

Hitler established the German Ancestral Heritage Organization, to study the spirit of the people, the land of the Nordic Indo-Germanic (Aryan) race inhabited and to get other Germans involved in its study. Wilhelm Teudt, head of the organization worked closely with Heinrich, head of the dreaded Nazi SS. Teudt visited Himmier at Wewelsburg, the SS’s Grail Castle in Saxony. The circular Nordturm (North Tower) of this geomantically designed triangular castle was said to be ‘the center of the earth’. It was built to support the Nazi Aryan race doctrines.

Himmler, Albert Speer, Hitler’s architect and other Nazis experimented with geomancy throughout Europe in an attempt to control that part of the world. The Fuhrerhauptquartier Wolfsschanze, Hitler’s main headquarters , was intentionally constructed on an ancient holy power well.

One example of the Nazi’s belief in geomancy happened during the German rush to take Moscow. At one point, a detachment of mountain troops were diverted to place the Nazi flag on top of a strategically unimportant mountain, Mt. Elbruz. But for the Nazis, this mountain was very important. The Persians, Aryan stock, believed that Mt. Elbruz was a world mountain, center of the Earth Energies. Himmler was convinced that if the Nazi swastika controlled Elbruz, they could better control the Russians.

When Other Repeating Numbers Appear: 301:302

One example of many, In 2007 I moved to Korea for a year, put my stuff in storage, the storage unit was #302.

The lock was broken so I moved my stuff  into unit #301.  When I arrived in Korea my apartment

was # 301, In 2008, I moved again to another city in Korea and my apt. was also # 301. Is this a coincidence?

Before I even got interested in numerology, as a child, #4 represented my family, #5 my family and my boyfriend or husband to be.  Twenty or so odd  years later, I read “Linda Goodman’s Sun Signs” where she explains the origins of numerology and why numbers are attributed meanings.  The meaning seem to all stem from the basic family unit, which she explains as father, mother and child.  So I wasn’t far off.  

Almost 4 years ago I had a devastating relationship breakup and decided to stay single. I still thought a lot about X in Korea.   Moving my storage unit from #302 to #301 seemed as if the universe was giving me the single status I had asked for. Three times in a row certainly does seem auspicious.

Six Feet Under

I just watched the finale of Six Feet Under and the entire series recently in 2008.
Wasn’t living in the U.S. in it’s heyday and not into TV back then. Still don’t have a TV now. Watching via internet is actually quite decent as I choose what to watch and am not bombarded with mindless crap..

THE FINALE
As cliché it may have been to viewers it tore me apart emotionally. Whatever choices the writers made that may have not made sense to some is valid but may not be the point. Art is made to make you feel something.
The epiphany I had as a result is that the choices man makes is merely part of the infinite cycle of life and death. And that in itself is quite beautiful, no different then a fallen leaf from a tree crumbled into the earth into a seemingly nothing, integrated back into the soil nourishing the tree that gives birth to another leaf and so on and on. The logo of the series is a tree with Lisa and Nate, both buried simply, among them who understood and honored this spiritual cycle.

The tree, as symbol for this process and the concept of family, functional or not, is etched in its rings and memorial to that experience, of that family, of a life that is infinite.

The finale flash forward rush of the future sequences seemed fitting. While sculpting the finale with detailed logic and precise perfection may have yielded a greater work of art, it may have lead to another year of episodes. Sometimes the passion to finish has to do with it being done, accepting that the future is unknown and contingent on further choice. There are other trees with stories to tell.

The last few minutes of one’s life as flash back or the next eighty flashing forward with speed has been over done in the visual medium but doesn’t make it less real and could merely be indicative of Claire’s state, in gestation of the past and anticipation of the unknown. As the only member of the Fisher Family who had ever made the choice to be free, to find herself and fulfill her life’s passion, the future events, thus had no futuristic feel as they were seen through her eyes at that point in time.

The Maggie at the doctor’s scene does imply she may have been pregnant with Nate’s child and fitting reason why they got together. On a spiritual level, he was able to give her something she lost, a child. They connected spiritually unlike Brenda who believed in nothing. That Nate decides to break off with Brenda and then dies is significant. It wasn’t that he was running towards Maggie rather away from Brenda.
Nate, as with most men need to feel they can change a women’s life for the better. He didn’t love Lisa and couldn’t give Brenda what she needed because deep down he saw her as too damaged and beyond his love. Both women mirrored this dissatisfaction back despite their love for him. He very well may have been narcissistic. In short, he couldn’t love that deeply. Maggie was the spiritual peace he was looking for, but I’m not convinced that would have worked either, as his real issue was commitment to a woman at the expense of his freedom. No woman could compete with that.
Although Nate was idealistic, spiritual and gifted at helping those who grieved, I didn’t feel sorry for him when he died. All the talk of telling the truth and he couldn’t do it himself. He was never honest with himself or the women that loved him. He tried hard to do the right thing, to love deeper, but it wasn’t in his nature. That he broke off with Brenda was a gift, finally in honesty, allowing her to let go of him more easily in truth.
Perhaps he learned that from the Lisa situation. That he couldn’t be honest with love in life is the question. His character served as a catalyst, of change in the series. Once everyone did, he was gone.

Golgusa Temple Stay

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia: Golgulsa Temple

Golgulsa (Stone Buddha Temple) is located 20 km east of the ancient Silla Dynasty capital city of Gyeongju in Southeastern Korea. In the Golgulsa temple area can be found the oldest historical Buddhist ruins on Mt. Hamwol and the only cave temple in Korea.
The original temple was built out of solid rock during the 6th century by Saint Kwang Yoo and his companions, Buddhist monks from India. This temple contains a sculptured Maya Tathagata Buddha (Buddha was known as the “Tathagata”; his mother was “Maya Devi”) and twelve rock caves.

With a glorious 11 days off from teaching during the Christmas holidays, I decided to do a “Temple Stay” and chose Golgusa because of the “Sunmudo” training. I hopped on the bus at Tongyeong bus terminal to Gyeongju, took a local bus from there and walked the 15 minute walk to the temple on Christmas day. My first impression was of two monks riding horseback that asked in English “Are you here for the Temple stay?”, I dragged my tiny koffer to the top of the winding road which lead to a few traditional Korean Pagoda type buildings colorfully painted, went to the office and was welcomed by a young Welsh woman, Kayte who explained how it all worked and assigned me to a room. I would be sharing a room with a Korean teacher who lived there year round, who spoke a bit of English. The sleeping arrangements were in Korean traditional style, sleeping directly on a heated floor. I arrived just in time for a vegetarian dinner where the women and men sat separately from each other with the instruction that one must only take the food they can eat…they don’t throw unfinished food in the trash. Well, I thought this a fair and conscientious request as I too dislike wasting food.

The food was simple vegetarian and not overly chili spiced as is usual in Korea…always rice, kim-chee, other green vegetables, tofu, beans, porridge, noodles, soup. You can eat as much as you want but keep in mind that there is 19:00 Sunmudo training after a 5:30 dinner.

Afterwards, you have a bit of free time, then chanting at 18:30 and training at 19:00.
After training more free time, lights out at 22:00. However, my roommate stayed up late working on her computer preparing for teaching work the next day. Yes, there was a computer, printer and video camera capturing video in the room while I was there, which was somewhat bothersome by the second day as I came to the temple to escape the work environment. She explained that the monks didn’t really like the idea of her electronic equipment but allowed it because she had been there almost a year. In any case, I moved to another room in another building, and was completely alone…but I had peace and was free from electrical intrusion.

At 4:00 am a Monk goes around waking everyone up by clapping together a bamboo stick reverberating the message to wake up. I’m surprised at the ease at which I woke up everyone morning. The first morning I did have a cup of instant coffee from the machines that are on the grounds, yet in all honesty it was a drop of coffee and probably more psychological that I stayed awake. 4:30 Chanting is mandatory for all temple stay people in the main shrine led by the Monks, then at 5:00 sitting Zen Meditation and Walking Meditation at 5:30. Afterwards, you have 30 minutes before breakfast is served which is very similar to dinner, then about an hour and a half free time before training, so I’d just hop back into bed and rest.
At 8:30 there is 90 minutes of Sunmudo training. Without having any background on Sunmudo other than it a Martial Art form created by the Monks, practiced since forever and kept a secret until recent years, I really didn’t know what to expect.
Sunmudo background information is taken from:

http://www.parandeul.co.kr/sun_overview.htm

The Formal name of Sunmudo is Buddhism Gum Gang Young Gwan. It is a training method to extinguish worldly pains and attain enlightenment. The characteristic of this training is the harmonization of the mind and body united with breathing. The trainers adopt Zen as a way of life.
Sunmudo is the Sun (Zen) martial art handed down from generation to generation by Buddhist families from the time when Buddha was alive 2,544 years ago. Sunmudo came to Korea during the early years of the Shilla Kingdom (57 B.C.-A.D.936) And influenced Hwarangdo. Hwarang which means the flower of youth referred to the units of elite warriors, drawn from ruling class families. The Zen martial art was then handed on to monk soldiers during the Goryo Kingdom (918-1392). Until the Gabo Kyongjang or Reform of 1894 during the Joseon Kingdom (1392-1910).
Buddhist monks were encouraged to practice the Zen martial art. However, it was neglected as the modernization of the country began to proceed in late 19th century. The Most Venerable Yang Ik Sunim, a monk at Bomosa temple revived the art by systematizing it. Then, the Venerable Jeok Un Sunim, a monk at Golgulsa temple worked to popularize it in the 1970s. The name, Sunmudo was given to the Zen martial art by Jeok Un Sunim in 1984. ‘Sun’, is the way to attain an intuitive illumination of mind and spirit through meditation. ‘Mu’ means “martial” and ‘Do’ means”way”.
Those who practice Sunmudo say one can attain a higher state of mind through both movement of body and spiritual calm. Non-Buddhists tend to think of Sunmudo purely as a martial art, but it is in fact a way to practice Zen.

My thoughts on Sunmudo:
It was “home”. Let me explain. My background as a dancer with intensive training for most of my early life, until I moved to Germany in 1993 was akin to Sunmudo. The most intensive part of my training was a two year program at Alvin Aliey Dance Theatre School, where I had 12 classes a week. Prior to that and afterwards I took free classes of my choice, a Summer dance program at Duke University, and various intensives in New York City at Martha Grahma School, May O’ Donnel, Lynn Simonson and more. Modern dance is rooted in Martial Arts, esoteric and ancient dance forms, which I had a lot of exposure to. My early years was totally immearsed in Ballet, Modern, Jazz and African dance, eventually working in small companies but landing a career in Musical Theatre, which took off in Germany. However, my real strength was singing and acting, and it was in Germany that I stopped being a “dancer”. The theatre I was fortunately employed by for five years operated in an old german opera house style and not in the up and coming Musical Theatre style that had just begun to jell in Germany at that time. The singers were separate from the dance ensemble and from the actors. For me this meant that my dancing skills were not up to par as a dancer in Theatre Des Westen’s eyes. I was never a ballet dancer and that was their barometer for excellance. On the few instances where I had the chance to do my thing in the company “Jazz” class, I remember the choreographer saying, “Now, I see the real Svetlana dancing with passion and drive”. I wasn’t able to show that in his chorography as his style was based in ballet and some type of weird free form crap, that had no soul. But, I was noticed for my voice and entertainer abilities so it was a blessing in disguise as I began to focus on those skills and was cast in roles, not main oones as my german was also not up to par and felt it never would be. Prior to Germany, I had worked in the U.S. and Japan and was cast in main roles. It’s all good because it created who I am today. But, I did experience a huge period of grief not being able to get good dancing parts where I could shine… and as well there wasn’t any decent dance training in Berlin other than Ballet and Modern and I was a Jazz dancer and street dancer (early hip hop).
That’s when I discovered Yoga and quickly found myself obsessed with it with the added spiritual aspect, taking class everyday, finding I had an edge with my dance training. Maybe I couldn’t be a “Concert dancer” but I was a “Yogini”.
I became so involved in Yoga that I worked at the Berlin Sivananda Ashram, making soup on Sundays, doing Karma Yoga five days a week and following a Swami around learning about Yoga. I chanted, meditated, studied a bit of Ayurveda, barely smoked cigs, no alcohol, my boyfriend also joined me on my journey. I really noticed and understood how meditation was possible only as a result of properly taking care of your body, what you put in it, excercising and balancing both body and mind. I looked forward to the end of class meditation because I was ready, I was free and open. I’d been to other Sivananda Ashram’s in the Bahamas, California, NYC and later tried other kinds of yoga, Ashtanga, Iyengar, flow, Bikram, etc. in Los Angeles, San Francisco & Berlin.

By 2003 my yoga study trickled to none, moving to Encinitas, California in 2004, I began again with Ashtanga full time and felt whole again, then moved up to San Francisco went back to college and hardly had time for yoga but studied meditation and psychic training for six months. I missed the physicality of yoga..I needed complete immersion not a class here and there. Doing yoga on my own was not the same as being in a room of like minded people, it was like church to me. From 2005 until the present I had no real immersion other than trickles here and there, survival took place of my spiritual quest. As a result, since my move to Korea, I had noticed a real decline in my body and mind. Living in Tongyeong is easy, everything I need is in a four block radius. I’m used to hustling around a city, walking, riding my bike everywhere and now I’d become a potato. I enrolled in an Aerobics class for a month and quickly got bored of arbitrary movements to silly electronic music, so I began doing yoga on my own, taking a yoga mat out by the sea, doing my thing..it was good, but it wasn’t church. I meditated often, but I couldn’t get the yoga thing going on my own regularly and realized I needed the spiritual aspect of training, that physical exercise alone was a disconnect…a spiritual connection was dire. So, I joined an English bible studies group in a Korean Pentecostal church.
I’d always wanted to read, learn and discuss the bible and found it interesting. Soon befriended people of the Church and sang at their Christmas Eve function. I’d also been to a Korean Episcopalian Church led by a Phillpino Minister when I first arrived but left as I didn’t feel a connection. Last night, I spent my first New Year’s Eve ever at the Pentecostal Church, it was quite strange not knowing when it was midnight…However, I feel good about spending Christmas Eve till New Year’s Eve in spiritual environments. But, I must say that although I’ve always had a deep connection with Jesus since a child, I prefer my experience at the Golgusa Temple with its ancient worship traditions that connects the body with mind. That Sunmudo, which is a combination of Meditation, Yoga, Tai Chi, Qi Gong and Martial arts is a way to achieve spiritual enlightenment by use of the body seems tailor made for my spiritual needs.

While at Golgusa, I had no expectations and didn’t pride myself at any prior meditation experience. I was only interested in breathing, eating and sleeping in a peaceful spiritual environment. While meditating I wasn’t having any profound experiences and just concentrated on the “doing”. After having tea with the Sunmudo Master, he said “Buddism is not about knowing, but about doing”. This made me feel I was on the right track and did have an interesting, and enlightening meditation experience. I had a sort of vision during one sitting, where I saw three Korean words, thought it a bit strange at the time and forgot about it until I remembered it again and asked a Korean woman what the words meant. She said it meant nothing. So I asked what each individual word meant and it was clear to me that it meant something. I decided to discuss it with the Master who surprisingly said what I had experienced wasn’t all that strange. Another instructor pulled me aside and explained to me in detail what he thought it meant, which was in accordance not to what I thought it meant at first, but on a deeper level with an issue I’d been working on for quite a while..and got an answer to a question I’d been praying to Jesus about.

Now does this mean I don’t believe in Jesus? No, not at all. See, at first when I was sitting in Zen Meditation, I felt a blankness and was a bit confused because when I meditate I do so with Jesus in mind. And I thought, okay here I am in a Buddist Temple, I can’t pray to Jesus can I? So, I didn’t, but I didn’t pray to Buddha either. I simply did the Buddhist way, to connect, to clear, to calm, to be. I’ve only read a little about the Buddhist way and it just makes sense. It’s the philosophy, way of life and Buddha nature that attracts me. I love the words of Jesus and who I pray to, I just don’t care much for Church. It’s like God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit is in me wherever I go and thus, don’t need a place of worship because I have a strong connection. Buddhism helps balance my earthy life and otherworldly aspects of my person because it’s rooted in esoteric teaching which is in tune with my true nature. And frankly I’m somewhat turned off by the Christian teachings and methods. Having tea with the Sunmudo Master everyday at 11:00 was quite special, he glowed from within, took his time when answering a question, as if taking in information melding it with his own with a resulting answer that was both simple and profound. Answers that inspire you to see a different perspective. His first question to us all, where we were from, at my turn was complicated: born in Germany, lived in France, grew up in the U.S., lived in Europe for 11 years and travelling about the last few years. His response, “Oh, you come from Earth” Next person he asked, “What planet do you come from?” Well, he had me then. There was a group of young challenged males who were beautiful and sweet, familes on a Buddhist vacation and a few foreigners. That we all spent the time together as one was very special as well.
I’ve asked questions at Church with answers that stipulated the tension between society norm verses the “way” as quoted from the Bible. Hearing stories on how “I was saved and found Jesus”, using terms like “the fear of God”…I just don’t feel good about the terminology. I believe Jesus loves us all and we shouldn’t fear God.

Symbols Gone Good

Finally, residing in a country where the “Swastika” is a benevolent symbol as intended.  I say this with relief, fingering the silver swastika that hangs around my neck, as a result of having lived in Germany for eleven years, where the symbol used for “black magic” purposes under Hitler’s rule could not shake its malign meaning.  I did a bit of reading on the Third Reich’s “Swastika”, WWII and the Holocaust, fascinated by the symbol and found that it’s presently against the law to use the Swastika or the word “Nazi” in Germany. Strange, by creating a law against it,  it still gives it a dark power it doesn’t deserve.  In my dream I’m running up and down a Berlin street screaming nazi nazi nazi to exhaust it’s meaning and envision correctly colored Swastikas placed upright plastered throughout Germany dispeling the lingering negative effects of a symbol gone bad.

Isn’t a logical approach to the healing of the Swastika’s misuse by introducing it into German culture as it was intended?  Symbols are powerful, and only so because of the thought intention behind it. 

In Reiki, symbols are used energetically to invoke healing and can only be introduced by a Master to a student before it’s used for healing.  Reiki is a universal energetic force available to all, some more than others depending on sensitivity, intention and attention.  The symbols are treated with the utmost care and respect with a spiritual oath that they be used only for the highest good, as their power is evident and has been so for centuries.

Here in Korea, the Swastika is often seen as a Buddhist symbol..and I’m relieved..and somehow feel that it’s all connected somehow…my life, its path and connection to my own past lives.  Traveling the globe feels like a journey into previous lives, places I’ve lived before, taking me back to my roots, further and further, until one day, I reach home…

I’ve  always felt deeply connected to countries I’ve travelled to, as if I am Korean, German, Japanese, American, Italian, British, French, Spanish, etc.  It’s a bondedness, a feeling at a soul level.  The connectedness can feel warm, knowing, familial, dangerous, sad, persecuted and always, always love…